If there was ever a new age in dating, it’s happening right now. If you’re one of the lucky ones to be happy with someone new, or settled with your soulmate then you don’t need to pay much attention. However, if you unavoidably find yourself joining the singles club once again or if you’ve been struggling to meet someone special then you need to know just what it’s like to date in 2016.
According to an article from the Guardian here are the top ways of meeting your significant other.
- 1. Blind Dates
- 2. Classified Ads
- 3. Dating Websites
- 4. Hobbies
- 5. Holidays
- 6. Office Romance
- 7. Social Media
- 8. Smirting **
- 9. Speed Dating
** Smirting: (flirting while smoking) arrived with the introduction of the smoking ban, and has helped make flirting that little bit easier. You’re outside, which eliminates the noisy din of the bar, and you get to chat to people outside your social circle.
As a non-smoker I had no idea ‘smirting’ even existed but I guess the intimacy that comes with lighting up a cigarette with someone in the pouring rain, whilst he offers you his coat, could certainly be considered a little romantic. I guess what people need to realise is that all the above is now completely normal, and yes everyone needs to proceed with some common sense and caution when meeting someone new, but meeting someone on ‘Tinder’ or ‘Plenty Of Fish’ is ok! Even though your parents may tut when they hear you’re on your 3rd date of the week, dating is simply changing and it’s important to remember that it’s not what they know or are used to.
We are ever becoming a society of convenience and impatience, and I am a perfect example of someone who is a little impatient when it comes to dating. I’m rather quick to know that this handsome guy on the other side of the table with absolutely no conversation skills whatsoever and wearing a t-shirt that is so tight on his arms it is almost certainly cutting off his blood supply is not ‘the one’, and not even ‘the one for now’. More than ever girls are career women, with power and more responsibility, we don’t have time to wait for Mr Right to casually jump onto the treadmill next to us in the gym (although we can hope!) and strike up a charming conversation.
My friend and I decided to try something new, and after reading the Daily Mail’s article on a girl that had travelled to 12 countries across the year on various dates, we figured maybe we were missing out?! We immediately went and signed up to MissTravel.com, an international dating site with people from all corners of the globe. At the end of the day it’s something different, it can even open up opportunities, but everyone using these kind of sites need to be safe, have common sense, and keep an eye out for potential danger – ultimately no different from meeting someone you don’t know in a bar on a night out in your hometown.
- Anyone that is offering you a trip without even messaging you is someone you should steer clear of. They are sending you the offer purely based on how you look and they know nothing about you – just like you know nothing about them!
- For the first 2 days you will get the creeps that appear to wait online for a new profile to be created and then they will send a ‘copy and pasted’ message to you.
- The more you are active on the site the more interaction you will get from other uses. As soon as you don’t log in for a few days, you will notice a significant drop in your inbox.
- Don’t give out your details to just anyone!
- Do your research on who you’re talking to, it’s not hard to use social media these days to confirm that someone is or isn’t who they are. Using mobile phone numbers can often tell you who they belong to online.
- ALWAYS tell someone you trust where you’re going, who you’re with and when you’ll be home. Make sure you have a time you’ll ‘check in’ with them to confirm you’re ok.
Being a cynical British girl with a dry sense of humour I do find it easier than others to pick up on the signs of someone that isn’t truthful or someone I don’t trust. But that’s not to say that I don’t get tricked sometimes myself. The first person I spoke to, through the safety of the websites own online message chat was supposedly a 35 year old fitness freak living in Miami. We did have a few things in common and for a couple of days we simply chatted about food, travel and general life. The only thing I didn’t know yet was whether he had any children, and on my probing he decided to finally reveal himself truthfully as a 59 year old man with two children similar to my own age!! The photos I had seen were simply him about 20 years ago, so you can see it’s not difficult to fall for a trap here and there. Usually your gut is the best way forward, deep down you often know whether you trust what you are seeing and hearing – if you are unsure AT ALL, then proceed with caution or don’t proceed at all!
Now the safety warnings are out of the way let’s finish by focusing on some of the good! The fact is that these days it’s not unheard of to find the man of your dreams online. So you should enjoy it, and find out if you have that connection with someone! If you are just looking for some casual fun then make sure you’re both on the same page and ALWAYS be honest about what you’re looking for. If you are looking for ‘the one’ then don’t be afraid to tell a guy that. If that puts off a guy then it’s clear he is not ready to be ‘the one’ for anyone and you shouldn’t be meeting up anyway.
Since I joined the website a few weeks ago, I have chatted to people in LA, Florida, France and Italy. Would I go out and meet someone abroad? If I had got to know them, had a few Skype dates and was absolutely comfortable then of course I would. A word of advice – if they offer to pay for a trip or flights and you’re happy to accept then that’s fine. Just make sure you’re not going to be financially dependant on them, have enough money to go your separate ways if that first date/meeting isn’t what you expected.
Certain topics to avoid on ANY first date still stands from decades ago. Do not discuss politics until you know each other better, avoid previous relationships, approach religion with caution and if you are opinionated (like me) try and tone it down or at least be tactful so as not to offend someone before you even know them! Believe me, it’s way too easily done.
I know that even though I am enjoying getting to know people this way, I still need to be careful as with any blind date. Do we ever really know who we are talking to? Watch this space!